In This Issue Kisses The Spiders' Christmas Fire, Ashes and Rebirth Sharing the Invisible Holiday Spirit Activity Memory Basket Activity

With so much lost, this year it's about finding the holiday spirit inside of us, for the things of spirit truly are invisible. This season we are discovering the gifts of grace and the gifts of spirit that burn bright through these tough times.

As we work to recover from the fires, we come alive again to the spirit of courage, endurance, love, compassion and kindness.

When reading the stories below, ask yourself,

"What or who in your life/world/home brings you light?"

"What or who uplifts your spirit?"

Enjoy these special holiday stories connecting us to the invisible spirit and light of the season.

Joan, Patti, Karen

Kisses

One Christmas morning as the family reached the end of the present opening, the little five year old daughter handed her dad a brightly colored package which she had obviously wrapped herself. She waited with glee while he carefully took off the sticky tape and the crooked bows.

When the present was finally opened, he looked inside, tipped it upside down and finally exclaimed, "But honey, it's empty. There is nothing in it!" The little girl looked at him with surprise and then answered, "Oh no daddy. It is not empty. The box is full of kisses!"

The father kept that box in a special place on his desk for many years.

From Patti.

Find out more about Patti:

	The Spiders' Christmas
Long ago in a small village in Italy there lived a cobbler, and each day he mended shoes as customers came in and out of his shop. He lived in a snug home above the shop with his two young children and wife. The cobbler loved Christmas for this was when he would go up in the attic and bring down a large oaken box. His children and wife would gather around and lift the lid. There nestled in soft green velvet would be the most beautiful Christmas tree ornaments. He would carefully lift them out and hand them to his children and say, "Be very careful. These ornaments have belonged to our family for hundreds of years. They are made of glass." Gently they would hang each ornament on the Christmas tree. There were delicate reindeer with golden antlers, silver stars, bright red sleighs with bells, and sparkling snowflakes. For the top of the tree there was a golden angel that shown forth. One night, a week before Christmas, the cobbler and his family were asleep in their home when a winter wind blew down the chimney. A strong gust swept a live coal from the fire onto the carpet. The coal began to smoke and then to burn. The flames crept along the carpet and swept up the walls. The cobbler woke and smelled the smoke. "Wake up, wake up!" he cried and shook his wife. "There's a fire, get the children!" Through the smoke they ran. Each grabbing a child, they stumbled down the stairs and outside. The cobbler turned and cried, "No, the ornaments!" He ran back into the burning house. The flames licked at his clothes as he ran back out with the oaken box under his arm. The family watched as the fire destroyed their home and everything they owned. The father looked at his family and said, "No one is hurt, we're all here, we're all alive and at least we have the ornaments." Their neighbors gave them a box of food, some warm clothes and told them of a cabin in the woods beyond the town that was abandoned. Clutching the box of ornaments, the cobbler and his family trudged through the deep snow and found the little cabin. They went inside and the wife looked up and frowned. There were cobwebs all through the rafters. There were a lot of cobwebs. In the corner she found a broom and was going to sweep the cobwebs away when the cobbler cried "No, no, please don't destroy their little homes." His wife stopped and turned around. "Whose homes?" she asked. "Look there in the rafters, those are the little spiders' homes. We've lost everything. Let them stay. I couldn't bear to destroy their homes," he said. His wife set the broom down with a sigh. Overhead the spiders heard the people talking. Little faces looked down and the spiders were thankful that their homes had not been taken away. That night the cobbler's wife whispered. "What are we going to do? We have no more food." The cobbler sighed. "I don't know, I need to buy leather and tools to make a living." "But husband we have nothing to buy them with." "No, we do have something, something very valuable -- the ornaments." "Not the ornaments! What about the children?" she cried. "I must sell the them. Don't tell the children." So the next day the cobbler went to town and sold his beautiful ornaments in exchange for enough money to get tools, leather and supplies. Then it was Christmas Eve and time to go get the Christmas tree. The father bundled up the children and together they set out into the woods to cut a small fur tree. They put the tree in the corner by the window and the children asked the question the father had dreaded -- "Where are the ornaments Papa?" "Well children, we no longer have them. But, we do have something else," he said. "We have you and you and you. We have each other. That is the most important thing, and look at the tree! It's beautiful just as it is -- green and fragrant with bits of snow." The cobbler tried to make his children feel better but his heart was heavy as he stared at the bare tree. That night as soon as all eyes were closed there were little movements up in the rafters. Tiny feet scurried and the spider's looked over the edge of the rafters where the bare tree stood. One by one each spider spun a silver thread and dropped down onto the tree. One ran to the lowest branch and started to spin. Soon a tiny star emerged beneath its legs. Another hung on a branch tip and began to spin a little sleigh, another spun two dancing children. Finally, the spiders all went to the top of the tree and together they spun a snow-white angel with feathery wings that shone forth. When they were done they climbed up their silver threads and hid. Christmas morning the sun shown in through the window onto the Christmas tree. The cobbler opened his eyes. "Oh, look at the tree," he cried, "Children! My Love! Wake up! See the tree! It's a miracle!" The family jumped out of bed and ran to the tree. The father reached out and gently touched the tiny ornaments. "Oh they're so beautiful, so soft," he said. The children felt the little sleighs and stars that looked like spun glass. The cobbler smiled. "Yes feel them. So delicate, just like life. Yes, like life." Then gathering his family around him the father said "I love you all so much! My children, Merry Christmas! My Love, Merry Christmas!" That Christmas they spent the day telling stories and every once in awhile the cobbler would look up at the rafters and smile. From Joan storiesbyjoan@hotmail.com

	Fire, Ashes and Rebirth
10/26/2003, 10/25 - 5:35 p.m.: The Cedar Fire in San Diego was started near Ramona, CA by a lost outdoorsman trying to signal for help with a flare. Essentially unchecked, this fire and several others in the country grew over several days to over 360,000 acres, destroying over 2200 homes and killing 16 people. Sunday 10/26/03 2:30 a.m. By early morning the fire was burning within a few miles of Peutz Valley (a 15 square mile neighborhood of Alpine, CA). Looking out over the hills, residents of the valley could see the lines of fire descending on them. Local Sheriffs did not order evacuation of Peutz Valley until noon when the flames were threatening to cut off the valley's only road in or out. Residents scurried to evacuate and get out of the fire's path. Evacuees were stunned as the raging fire encircled Peutz Valley at 50 miles per hour, igniting nearly everything in under 10 minutes. For the next 15 hours, houses, outbuildings, equipment, trees, animals, 100 year-old oaks and vegetation burned to the ground. The fire was so hot, aluminum rims on vehicles left behind had melted and run down the dirt like water. One valley couple, one of the last in a cavalcade of fleeing cars and trucks, was cut off when a large tree fell in front of them. They were trapped and spent tortuous hours evading the fire by scurrying from one side of their property to another to escape the encroaching walls of flames. When it was over, their property had miraculously survived, along with their backhoe. By this time, ash was falling like snow and the smoke was so thick you could barely see your way. Yet this couple spent the next hours and days going from home to home fighting the fire, smothering fallen burning trees, putting out smoldering branches and stumps with dirt from their backhoe, and saving several homes. Two other men in the valley had also stayed to fight the fires, each thinking they were surviving and battling alone, wondering if they were going to make it. Eventually this brave handful of residents found each other and continued through the night their seemingly impossible fight against the fire. Monday 10/27/03 12:00 p.m. By mid-day, 75 of 100 homes in the valley were destroyed. Power and telephone poles were destroyed, flames still burning from their tops. Burning old growth oak trees and fire debris blocked Peutz Valley Road. The terrain was a moonscape -- black, brown, gray and white. Only black sticks of trees, lonely blackened rock chimneys stark against the sky, a few remaining houses, and glowing orange stumps remained on the barren gray landscape. The next weeks were spent organizing recovery efforts, communicating and caring among neighbors, and cleaning up -- all Herculean efforts -- and all without water, electricity (other than a generator), phones (cell phones don't work out there) or internet. A communal meal for 50 was provided nearly every night for two weeks as residents dealt with their bewilderment, confusion, loss and grief. The daily meetings provided a place to share stories, focus solidarity, provide emergency care, and engage in creative problem solving for all. Residents came together for the first time ever to tackle their crisis as one. The daily meetings and meals strengthened relationships and resolve. With tears and laughter, everyone pitched in to help one another. Volunteers began appearing from as close as San Diego and as far away as Kansas. Clothing, food, and some tools flooded the site. Volunteers quickly helped sort and distribute the donations, clear brush and homesites, navigate the maze of relief agencies and paperwork, fill sandbags, stabilize hillsides and prepare for floods and erosion. Today: Creativity and the Recovery Continues. Local columnist Richard Louv writes (12/14) how from all the great fires in history, out of the ashes comes great cities and great ideas. The flames are followed by bursts of creativity and inventiveness. The residents of Peutz Valley have now created a non-profit organization and have dreams they are bringing into reality for a community center, park, and sustainable economic enterprises for their valley. This is just their expression in answering the questions Louv poses: 1. How can San Diego become a creative community, rather than a community of creative individuals? 2. What new technologies could be created and applied to fire prevention and fighting? 3. How we will revive and restore the scorched backcountry? 4. How can our extraordinary communities emerge from isolation and what creativity can they unleash together? 5. How can the arts stimulate the region's ability to communicate? 6. What is the light, the essence of San Diego and what new creations can San Diego give to the world - a gift that no other city can give? Knee-jerk pessimism is boring and like smoke, Louv writes, can hide the light and obscure the path. It's time for finding that invisible spirit of the holidays and the spirit of love and creativity within each of us. It's time for letting our light burn bright, and it's time for rebirth. Onward. From Karen

	Sharing the Invisible Holiday Spirit Activity
FROM JOAN: I come from a family that loves to talk and discuss things, but I've discovered that talking and sharing is often not the same thing. For many years I would I often leave these holiday gatherings with a feeling of emptiness. Somehow I had not said the most important things, or we had discussed current events and plans but not things like, "What kind of presents did my grandmother make for her children when she was a young mother?" or "What kind of games did my father play with his eight brothers and sisters when they got together?" Included here are two games and devices I've used to get my talkative family sharing stories. Some were at first met with skepticism, but over the years friends and family have thanked me many times for these special times to share and now I go home from holiday gatherings with a full heart. Below are some ideas and a list of questions/prompts that can be used in several different ways: A) Put them in a basket and let people pick one out and share. B) Have one person pick a question from the basket and then people choose from the group who to ask the question of. C) Pass the questions out ahead of time and let folks write a memory or think about what they would like to share. Often, after people get started, the stories continue to emerge spontaneously and people just keep sharing them! THE QUESTIONS/PROMPTS 1. What was the funniest holiday experience you've ever had? 2. Tell us about a pet you shared the holidays with. 3. Tell us about the time you received the nicest gift anyone ever gave you. 4. What about a holiday or time when you got into trouble for something you had already been told not to do? 5. When did you give a gift that you've never been sorry you gave? 6. If you could give the world, or your family any gift, what sort of gift would you like to give? 7. If you were to start a new tradition for the holidays what sort of tradition would you like to start and why? 8. What holiday or party you would like to live over again? 9. Tell us about a time when you learned something from a child. 10. Can you remember someone who used to come and visit at the holidays or at your house when you were growing up? 11. What is a very fond (or funny) memory of lighting candles? 12. When you think about celebrating " the light," what time in your life does it remind you of? From Joan

	Memory Basket Activity
An alternative is to do a memory basket. This is especially fun for children and elderly as it "triggers " memories and ideas. Fill a large basket with odd and assorted items. Just about anything will trigger a memory for someone. Thrift store collectibles, toys, keys, tools, old postcards, recipes, books, family photos, spices, medicine bottles, etc. If it's been around for sometime throw it in. Use these items as the questions and let folks either pick an object or be given one and share the memory it evokes. Like any game, it's fun to add "rules," like pick an object and share how it relates or reminds you of winter, Chanukah, Christmas, etc., or pick an object and share how it relates or reminds you of when you were 5-10 yrs old. From Joan

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